Had Some Eloquent Graffiti Like we ll Meet Again

Tuesday, August 15, 2006 :::

So, finally, I quit smoking.

Never thought information technology would happen, least of all here. But I finally just lost the taste for it. Non to say that the urge doesn't get me once in a while, just I haven't caved in. I think part of what made it easier is that I didn't make a house proclamation to everyone that I was doing it. I don't remember how long it'south been, I'm not counting the days. Information technology's been at least 5. Guess that means I'm over the hump?

But of all the places, I finally decided to stop smoking here. Guess I needed to do some cocky-improvement, or to discover some inner demon to fight, or something.

But I've got that going for me

::: posted by Volition at 22:51

Saturday, August 12, 2006 :::

Hey Kids,

I know it's been quite a while since I posted, every bit I'k writing mostly in my damn myspace folio now. Information technology'south quite the dichotomy, as myspace is rather convenient to utilize and I tin track friend's pictures and pages. But the inverse is also true, there are hordes of the feckless purile whiners out there that merely need a place to feel ignored and forgotten. It feeds their angst, which since it'southward the only thing that they tin can actually feel they crowd around like it's the last fire in a blizzard.

So plenty of abusing the pathetic attention whores of the net.

I am in Afghanistan, and have been for a couple months. I'm in the south part of the country, where most of the action is. Unfortunately for me, I'1000 mired in a headquarters area where I very well could get my unabridged tour without ever firing a shot in anger. That disturbs me on a very primal level. I have skills and abilities that could be of bang-up employ to the teams that actually become out and conduct operations. I am forbidden from going out yet, because they need someone here to type people's reports and re-write their electronic mail for them, every bit senior officers only can't be fucked doing it themselves.

In the meantime I've got some Halou that but came in, the new album is practiced stuff. Also I managed a new laptop to play games and such on, it may put me in the position of going slowly broke, merely holy shit is this thing worth it. Information technology's complete geek porn. Very rarely do I have the opportunity to beget something both new, and pinnacle of the line, and I really splurged on this ane.

Oh well. If you lot read back a few hundred posts, you'll run beyond the last fourth dimension I got deployed. It's strange to me that I've been on and off writing hither for 3 years. I can't beleve it's been that long. I tin't believe that anyone honestly reads this crap. Only I suppose I'm doing this as much for me, as I am for you. It's my chance to write my thoughts on the wall of the subway platform for all to see.

Will

::: posted past Will at 22:55

Friday, June 30, 2006 :::

Delight, remember me
Happily
Past the rosebush laughing
With bruises on my chin
The time when
We counted every blackness auto passing
Your house beneath the hill
And up until
Someone caught us in the kitchen
With maps, a mountain range,
A piggy bank
A vision also removed to mention
But

Please, think me
Fondly
I heard from someone you're still pretty
And so
They went on to say
That the pearly gates
Had some eloquent graffiti
Like 'Nosotros'll meet again'
And 'Fuck the man'
And 'Tell my mother non to worry'
And angels with their gray
Handshakes
Were always done in such a hurry
And

Delight, think me
At Halloween
Making fools of all the neighbors
Our faces painted white
By midnight
We'd forgotten one another
And when the morning came
I was ashamed
Only now it seems so featherbrained
That flavor left the earth
And then returned
And now you're lit up by the city
So

Please, call up me
Mistakenly
In the window of the tallest tower call
Then pass u.s. by
But much besides high
To see the empty road at happy 60 minutes
Exit and resonate
Just like the gates
Effectually the holy kingdom
With words similar 'Lost and Constitute' and 'Don't Look Down'
And 'Someone Save Temptation'
And

Delight, call back me
Equally in the dream
We had equally rug-burned babies
Among the fallen copse
And fast comatose
Aside the lions and the ladies
That called you lot what you like
And fifty-fifty might
Give a gift for your behavior
A fleeting chance to run across
A trapeze
Swing equally high equally any savior
But

Delight, remember me
My misery
And how information technology lost me all I wanted
Those dogs that love the rain
And chasing trains
The colored birds above at that place running
In circles round the well
And where information technology spells
On the wall backside St. Peter'due south
So bright with cinder greyness
And spray pigment
'Who the hell can run across forever?'
And

Delight, remember me
Seldomly
In the car backside the carnival
My hand between your knees
Y'all turn from me
And said 'The trapeze human action was wonderful
But never meant to last'
The clown that passed
Saw me just come up with anger
When it filled with circus dogs
The parking lot
Had an chemical element of danger
So

Please, recall me
Finally
And all my uphill clawing
My love
But if i make
The pearly gates
Do my best to brand a cartoon
Of Grand-d and Match
A boy and girl
An angel kissin on a sinner
A monkey and a man
A marching band
All effectually the frightened trapeze swingers

Na-na
Na-na-na
Na-na
Na-na...

- Iron and Wine
"Trapeze Swinger"

::: posted by Will at 08:57

Monday, May 08, 2006 :::

I love yous more Beer. It sounds featherbrained at first, just considering my aspirations information technology actually is a compliment I think. More the hours of labor I've spent craft, and researching and reading. More than the fourth dimension and the money I've spent on ingredients, equipment, and references. More than all of that.

I love you more than Genevive. I've really put myself into that car, and after thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours of agony and labor it's my greatest creation. Then much time in and around information technology, hours spent perfecting my driving technique and dreaming of the time when I could really use it to it's greatest potential. I love you more that.

I love y'all more than the Ground forces. Which at first glance appears to be an absolutely retarded statement, given the amount I bitch. Just honestly, it'due south been good to me in most cases. And despite knowing what was surely going to happen in grooming here, I volunteered to be where I am because I really needed this mission. But I love you and so much more.

I love you more than the giant playground at St. Kilda where we took the kids several sunny afternoons to play. I love you more than than the little winery that we both love, looking out over the Barossa at the rolling hills wrapped in grape vines. I love y'all more than the nature walks, and the picnics, and the little cafe we have coffee at downwardly the street from the Holden dealership.. which I catch you lot peeking at every time we drive by information technology.

I love y'all more than than the tardily nights with a drink on the couch together, and the early mornings with the coffee and the kids trip to schoolhouse. I deffinately love you more than the driver train that holds us up for like xv minutes practicly every time we drive through that particular surface area.

I love you lot more than the one-act guild we went to, and the petty resteraunt down the street where we had a snack. I dear you more than the barbeques with friends, the parties on the back deck while kids run rampant and adults run amok.

I love you more the mall'southward balls, the seafront and all the great places inbetween.

I love y'all very much, Melissa. And this is the closest modern equivalent to shouting it from the mount-tops. Mississippi doesn't accept mountains, let solitary the tops of which to shout from, and even if they did, not almost enough of the right people would hear me.

::: posted by Volition at 09:56

Wed, April 26, 2006 :::

Post #201, and things have not improved.

I know that I haven't been posting here like I used to, just sometimes it's difficult for me to discuss with the great unknown how I'm feeling anymore. Things just aren't working like they should anymore.

My grandmother had a stroke, is paralyzed on her correct side, and had to be admitted. Indefinately.

My mom is going to take to sell the house much sooner than we ever anticipated. Financial bug are stacking upwardly.

Things at my mobilization station are absolutely chaotic. Anybody knows exacly what's going on, except when I hear any information it's straight alien with the previous information. It's like know one knows what'due south happening, only worse.

My girlfriend, and soon to be wife (!) is moving to a new firm and is trying to handle that and financial problems, and family problems, and being separated from me more than we have been before.

On top of that I tin can't seem to become anything right. I experience like I'thousand a frayed fleck of cloth, as things begin to pull autonomously thread past thread I lose integrity. Soon I'll be a pile of useless fluff, hire asunder by the stress I'k subjected to after all these niggling cuts began the inevitable.

The hardest part of any of this is the lack of time for me to only cope. I alive in an open bay with six handfuls of guys. No matter where I become, there's someone else there. I can't get out the base. I can't go anywhere on the base without a partner. If I try and sit for five minutes I get tasked out for something. The but way I manage to get any time at all to myself to reconsile the state of affairs I'm in is when I sleep at nighttime.

And in that 5 minutes before I slumber I feel the weight of and then many bug on me, I experience my new family's bug abroad, my onetime family'south issues dorsum home, and my issues here burdensome down on me. What compounds it all is that at that place actually isn't annihilation I tin can do virtually any of it. If I was dwelling, I could assist movement and promise. If I was with my new family unit abroad I could help Melissa pack and move things to the new house.

Suprise suprise, I merely got tasked out. Never a fourth dimension for me anymore. No self left anymore.. merely what others demand me for. You have got to be fucking kidding me.

::: posted by Will at sixteen:00

Tuesday, April 18, 2006 :::

Wow kids, is it everloving hot here.. We were out preparation in the field today and had four or v people fall out equally rut casualties. One bonus is that we have an assload of CLS'southward (Gainsay Life Saver) and that means most of us including myself have assistance bags on us at all times.

At that place were three IV's administered in the field, and a few more people went home to the barracks on lite duty to recover. It'due south in the mid-90's F and sixty+% humidity here.. the worst function of it is that we're wearing long pants, boots, tshirts, long overshirts, 20kg's of body armor, helmets, weapons, etc. And in my case, a CLS handbag every bit well. Running around in all that shit gets pretty dicey in this kind of weather condition. To give you an idea, I had sweat literally beading through the nylon on the side of my desert boots and dripping off the lesser of my shirt cuffs.

Nosotros got out of the field and I took all my gear off and information technology dripped on the floor. I drank 8-10 liters of h2o in ii hours and never had to piss. I've had fifty-fifty more since then, and still don't take to. Aridity is a killer, and you can only fight it by drinking so much water that information technology makes yous sick to your stomach. I hate this shit.

Bonus was that no one from my team went downward from the heat, and we're all watching each other pretty closely. I would venture to say that we've got the most cohesion of whatsoever of the teams. That really makes me feel good almost things.

I haven't had a common cold beer in days. And correct now, I would violate probation for one right now.. (within joke I gauge)

It's the same erstwhile routine anymore. Get up ass early, go railroad train for hours, come back here, clean my weapons, get a few minutes to my self, set up and go dorsum out for more than classes or training. This pre-deployment validation process is bunk as shit. One day when it'due south not opsec'd I'll tell you guys all about how fucking retarded this is.

Anyway, time to drink more water and then I don't die.

"his could exist the very minute
I'm aware I'one thousand alive
All these places feel like home

With a name I'd never called
I tin make my outset steps
As a child of 25

This is the harbinger, concluding straw in the
Roof of my mouth equally I lie to yous
Just because I'm sorry doesn't mean
I didn't bask it at the time

You're the only thing that I love
Information technology scares me more every mean solar day
On my knees I remember clearer

Goodness knows I saw it coming
Or at least I'll merits I did
Simply in truth I'm lost for words

What have I done information technology's besides late for that
What have I become, truth is nothing even so
A simple mistake starts the hardest climb
I promise I'll do anything you enquire...this time"

::: posted past Will at 13:43

Wed, March 29, 2006 :::

Hey Kids,

Welcome to the Replacement Visitor Federal Penn.

Or, how to salute a few hundred times a twenty-four hours without hurting your correct arm.

No Shit, here I am. Information technology'due south about the worst place you could want to exist on your birthday. I turn 26 today, and I'thou hoping I can make this one more day in the Replacement Visitor.. I need to go to the all ranks club and go hammered.

I've got a couple of Noble Eagle vets from Lewis and Depot and a few guys that accept been over to the shit. So we talk alot of trash and eat alot of shitty chow-hall food.

Although I retrieve my pay has FINALLY been straightened out. Thank God. Information technology'southward not very encouraging when not simply can they detect any of your records for a week but you discover that y'all somehow mysteriously owe DFAS 1600$. Holy tits!

On a more personal note, the tension of existence away from home and having unresolved problems back in that location, friends and family then far away, it'southward not an easy affair. I know that it would be much harder if I had issues at dwelling house. I'm really glad I don't.

So peace to everyone out in that location. I'll update every bit much as I tin can, but regime computers aren't so down with free speach.. they lock out access to all my journals. So I'll be doing information technology guerilla style for a while..

I'chiliad officially a REMF.. "How do you take your coffee, Colonel?"

Volition

::: posted by Will at 10:36

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Source: https://willanth.blogspot.com/

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